If you are a parent, know someone who is a parent, has a parent, and you would agree that parenting can be very difficult-this is for you! Parenting has its challenges at every stage and age. Mark Twain is said to have said, “When they (children) are thirteen, put them in a barrel and nail the lid shut, then feed them through the knothole. And “When they are sixteen, plug the knothole.”
A parent’s priority is to gradually transfer a child’s dependence away from the parents until their dependence rests solely on God. Our children, when they are little, depend on us for everything. Over time, we will help transfer their dependence to where they will no longer depend on us, but instead, they depend on the only One who will ever be completely faithful and true to them in every single way. We teach them to depend on God.
Do you realize that as a parent and a follower of Jesus Christ, God has put within you the power to change generations and generations to come? Deuteronomy 6 gives us the two most important principles that we will ever live out as a parent and/ or a follower of Jesus. Moses restated the Ten Commandments that Israel had received 40 years before and then he gave one of the greatest teachings on parenthood in all of scripture. He said to teach your children to fear the Lord, teach them to live according to God’s commands and when you do, not only will you be changed, but the next generation and the generation after that will be different too. We must train the next to depend on the One and only God who created everything instead of on anyone else. To raise-up the next generation we need to do two things:
1. Love our God. The Bible says this. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all of your soul and with all of your strength.” Notice, the scripture does not say with some, or with a little bit, or with a percentage, but we are told to love God with all of our heart. All!!!
Whenever I go to get a flu shot, I try to act all brave and the nurse pulls out the needle- mostly I just look away and wait until its over! Once I receive the shot- what did she actually put into my body? To keep me from getting the flu, she gives me a little bit of the flu. Just a little bit, which makes me immune to the whole thing, and I would argue that as parents, so many parents unknowingly give their children just a little bit of the things of God, making them immune to all of His goodness and glory and power and majesty. They find themselves knowing just a little bit about God but not knowing God personally and intimately in a life-changing way. Now, the problem is, in the world that we live in, there are a lot of things that can distract us from loving God with all of our heart. We work so hard pouring ourselves into our careers trying to get more things and we end up not giving our children what they really need, which is us and a deeper relationship with the only One they need to really know ultimately; God, and God alone.
You may be thinking to yourself, I do love the Lord with all of my heart, yet you don’t have time to worship with God’s people and honor His name. This isn’t just for parents it is for all believers. When we don’t make ‘time’ for church, for God, or for God’s people, that sends a significant message to our children and the other children and people inyour community and your church family. How important is your role to your children, grandchildren, with the believers around you? I came across a study a few years ago that I thought was interesting about kids who grow up and become active Christ Followers as adults.
• If mom and dad went to church, then seventy-two percent of kids will go as adults. That’s pretty awesome.
• If only mom went to church, the percentage drops to fifteen percent. This is mirrored in the church family too- if church is only for women and children that percentage is reflected there too. Men, and especially dads, how important is your role?
• If dad only went to church, it’s back up to fifty-five percent. DADS/ MEN, NEVER underestimate the value of your role in disciplining and leading your children to know Christ. And your example to other men and young people in the church is crucial- especially if there aren’t other godly men in a student’s life.
If neither mom nor dad went, the number drops down to only six percent of kids who will grow up and follow Christ and be active in a church.
Love the Lord your God with all of your heart. That means not only in your words, but in your actions. Men and women of God, Moms and Dads, Grandparents, do you love God with all of your heart, or with some of your heart? Because just a little bit, may not be what our kids need. They need the whole counsel, the glory of God.
“Christ is not valued at all, unless He be valued above all. Christ is not Lord at all unless He is Lord of all.” St. Augustine. Secondly:
2. We are called to lead our families spiritually. When our children are little and even when they are adults. We can’t choose for them or force our faith on them, but we can talk about God. We can share what He has done in us and for us. We can be examples and witnesses of His grace. Our marriages can be marriages that our adult children want to emulate. We can be generous, and our children will see the joy we have in giving and being a part of helping others. Spiritual talk becomes not just something we do on the weekends on the way to church or youth group or Celebrate Recovery, it becomes a part of seven days a week, of everything that is going on. We lead our children, young and old, spiritually.
Our role is to transfer dependence. To work ourselves out of a job! They no longer depend on us, now they depend on God. How do we do that?
1. We love God. It starts with us. If you want to half-heartedly let life happen, let me promise you, life will happen, and you will kiss your kid’s goodbye, send them off to college, walk them down the aisle, and you are going to wonder, “Where did it all go?”
2. Lead them. As Christ followers we are to lead- our own lives and the lives that we are responsible for- in our families, in our realms of influence at church, in the community, wherever God has placed you in that role.
Overall: Love God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength. Then lead as He calls you to lead.
